


All the Reasons Why

by Basil_Gray



Series: Finding You [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-02-23 00:24:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13178400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Basil_Gray/pseuds/Basil_Gray
Summary: Keith reflects about the little things that led up to him falling for Lance and how he is feeling now.





	1. First kiss, do you like Messi?

**Author's Note:**

> This series of oneshots belongs to my fic “Dark side of the Moon” and takes place right after the events of chapter 5. I’ll do my best to write it so that those who aren’t reading the main fic can still follow along, but it will have stuff from the fic mentioned, so hopefully no one gets too lost or confused. 
> 
> Thanks for reading as always!
> 
> Also since y’all from the other fic already know I love giving ships and people songs.
> 
> Klance in canon universe is: 
> 
> Ribcage - Crywolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith is weak for corny jokes.

They say first loves always hurt, but he wasn’t prepared for the sting that verberated in his chest or the burning that spread from the painful epicenter that threatened to consume his whole body. 

He wasn’t prepared for the overwhelming dose of disappointment that made itself physical in the form of tremoring hands and violent hiccups. Keith could remember on one hand the number of times he’d cried.

He was ashamed of himself. He was angry at Shiro. He was mourning the loss of “what if’s”.

_What if I told him?_

_What if our feelings were mutual?_

_What if we could make each other happy?_

_What if it was me holding his hand?_

Keith held out his hand in front of himself, pale fingers spread wide, wintry in temperature. His cold hands had always made him selfconcious; nobody wanted to be touched by cold hands.

He imagined Lance to life in front of him starting with the boy’s hands. Long slender fingers, faultless as the rest of him, towered over his own. He could feel Lance’s palm, as warm as the sun that kissed the Cuban’s skin, pressed against his own contrasting palm.

Next he imagined that warm skin travel forward starting with the boy’s lanky wrist, every blemish including the scar on his forearm that Keith hoped really came from a surfing injury,  formed until he was facing that signature smug grin. 

Thin lips tilted upward in one corner, a nose sculpted handsomely, not damaged like his own from brawls. A long, narrow bridge leading up to bold, blue eyes that looked like crystallized water droplets from the deepest, purest oceans untouched by corruption. Lovely thick lashes guarded those eyes from the elements, and finely groomed eyebrows wiggled to match his smug grin.

It was as if he was the real thing. Keith thought about how pathetic it was that not even the slightest detail of Lance had been missed like the tiny fleck of a freckle on his bottom lip that he most definitely wanted to kiss on several occasions. 

Keith wanted to reach out and grab the mirage but was afraid it would break away and vanish like smoke, so he settled for the heat on his palm that his brain obviously imagined up as well to appease his sad heart.

He remembers the exact moment he realized his own feelings for Lance McClain, Voltron’s self-proclaimed sharpshooter and loverboy, even if the other feigned ignorance. It was when Keith was cradling him in his arms that he knew he needed to protect this boy for the rest of his life even if that meant taking out a full fleet of galra at the expense of his own life.

The stark realization that Lance wasn’t unbreakable was enough to finally make his heart and his mind work together. When someone is dying their life flashes before their eyes, but when you’re holding the one you love even if it’s unknown to you at the time, all the reasons why you love them flash before your eyes no matter how small or mundane.

Keith remembered the first time one of Lance’s jokes made him laugh and started the tiny fissure in his heart. It was sometime after they had settled into the Castle of Lions and Lance had been going strong with jokes everyday with the same lion-theme. They had all been stupid, but one had particularly made Keith laugh, maybe because he was in a fairly decent mood due to the fact that Lance had not antagonized him that whole week. 

“Ok guys what's a lion's favorite soccer player?”

When no one had answered correctly Lance delivered the punchline.

”Lion-el Messi! Get it?”

Keith had been the only one to laugh amongst the sighs and groans of the not-so-impressed paladins. Lance had asked him something then that Keith had still yet to ask him why. It was an out of place question since Lance knew Keith wasn’t into sports and Messi was before their time.

”Hey Keith, do you like Messi?”

”Uh no?”

”That’s too bad.”

Keith wanted to ask him now why it mattered if he liked Messi. He wanted an excuse to charge up to the boy holding his doppelgänger’s hand and ask him why he wanted to know if he liked Messi. Why was he holding K’s hand? Why he hadn’t considered him? Why he wasn’t good enough?

Why wasn’t he good enough for anyone?

Even as Shiro kissed him he felt as though Shiro wasn’t actually kissing him, but someone faraway, deep in the back of the black paladin’s mind and Keith was just the vessel. Shiro’s eyes had been distant. He could feel his friend’s gaze looking passed him as if he was the unfocused image in a camera lense as he kissed him like Keith fantasized doing so Lance.

Keith even went as far as closing his eyes, arms dropping in surrender, and decided that at least his stolen first kiss was taken by someone that desired him, his best friend, and not someone he’d regret later. It could have been worse right? 

Except the disappointed look Shiro gave him when he pulled away made Keith’s stomach twist in unforgiving knots that made him sick and angry. So he blew up on him, regrettably threw his mother’s daggar, and chastised Shiro for something so trivial— something that had no chance of occurring.

Who cares about first kisses anyways?

Or first loves!

Being someone’s first experience doesn’t matter so shouldn’t who you’re experiencing your firsts with either. Right?

All that matters is that you experience it at all, and Keith did.

His first kiss was exhausting. It was tired limbs that just wanted to lie down on the familiar castle beds. 

His first kiss was anxious. Confused eyes darting back and forth across the body approaching him quickly, trying to analyze someone he had always been able to read, but suddenly he was illiterate.

His first kiss was quick. Full lips crashing hard into his, dry and rough from stale, sanitized ship air but not completely undesirable. They left his own chapped lips as quickly as they came, Keith shoving at his friend instinctively. 

His first kiss was unsure eyes that wouldn’t look up to meet his own and half murmured words too incoherent to understand their meaning.

His first kiss was gone like his chances with Lance.


	2. Bros Keep Other Bro’s Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith reflects on his conversation with K during their sleepover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Takes places during chapter 7!

_You should tell him.._

K’s words resonated throughout his body as he laid on the palette he had made across from K’s bedroom. It was easy for his otherself to say those words when they were the one holding his crush’s hand. Lance had never winked at him let alone try to hold his hand, or say something nice, or follow him around like a puppy dog. 

He just argued with him.

Lance often times made him feel like those girls on the playground that boys teased until they were at the point of tears because they “liked” them. Which led him to believe for a while that Lance liked him, but the teasing never went beyond that and Keith’s hope sizzled out before it could set fire.

But K had said that to him like he was confident that if Keith confessed to the Blue paladin then he wouldn’t be disappointed, so now he didn’t know how to feel. K had made it so clear in front of everyone that nothing was going on between him and Lance. He knew the thing about Allura was a lie.

Thats why he was here now.

He’d sense the lie when K’s eyes didn’t match in the sincerity of his voice, but at the time he didn’t understand his motive. And it only took him a short time to realize that K had done that for his sake. He was trying to make him feel at ease so he wouldn’t run away to the blades again and Keith appreciated that so much. 

He felt a sense of comradery, like he’d felt with Shiro. Maybe it was because Keith looked so much like him that made Keith feel this way, like there was an invisible string knitting them closer together as K spent more time in their reality. He wasn’t sure if it was healthy but it felt nice to have that in someone else other than Shiro.

That’s also why he had proposed the idea of them becoming brothers. K had no one and he had no one, except Voltron, which he was incredibly thankful for but it wasnt the same or maybe it was but his feelings are just confused because they'd all been thrusted into this makeshift family because of an intergalactic war.

Keith just wanted something that was chosed not out of obligation. Not that he still felt that way but the roots of this new family began because they were all obligated to save the universe in giant robot space cats. 

With K, there was no obligation holding over either one of their heads. He could leave if he wanted and it wouldn’t hurt anyone, except maybe him...or Shiro. Keith didn’t want to admit it ever out loud, but the thought of people walking away from him, leaving him...it settled uneasy in his chest.

He wanted K to stay almost as much as he wanted Lance to see him as a man.

And now he was thinking of the mouthy Blue paladin again and his stupid jokes, and his stupid lopsided grin he’d very much like to kiss. Maybe K was right.

Besides, he has nothing left to lose anyways.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really felt like Kieth needed some clarification as to why he went from being a brat at breakfast to wanting to be K’s bro. :3


	3. I do like Messi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes place during chapter nine!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keith is weak for rambling fools. :3

He’d turned on his heel and left Shiro without another word and went straight for where he’d know he’d find Lance. And sure enough, he found him blades deep in young recruits doing what he does best. But for once he had wished he was wrong, just once.

Lance is a good person— his heart is basically the size of Earth’s moon. Keith knows that Lance doesn’t try to hurt him intentionally, he knows that the flirting is something that comes naturally with the Blue paladin, and for a moment, Keith wondered if K had felt this same twist in his gut for his Lance.

He hoped that the Lance in K’s reality wasn’t a flirt like his Lance is because it hurt more when you couldn’t be mad at them. It festered inside of you till you erupted like a violent volcano and Keith was waiting for someone to send him over the edge. 

Lance couldn’t know that all those charming smiles and corny lines, all those winks and finger guns, like the ones he was giving now to one of the younger blade members, cut him, not deep, like a knife but just an annoying nick that itched as it healed.

Because why would you suffer someone through these feelings if you supposedly liked them? Keith could count on no hands the number of times he’s flirted with someone since realizing his feelings for Lance because there was no one! How could you flirt with someone when you supposedly like someone else?

In front of them to make matters worse! Lance couldn’t have known the effects of his actions because he is good and kind and caring.

 _He wouldn’t hurt me_..

But right now, in this moment as he leaned in with his arm resting on the strangers shoulder and playfully flirted about as he always did, he made Keith feel not special— like his feelings for Keith were fleeting and trivial. Not important. Easy to get over. Weak.

Not that he ever wanted to be special to anyone especially not to Lance always making a fool of himself McClain! 

But Lance had made him feel special for the short amount of time between Shiro and K telling him of the paladin’s feeling and now. The short amount of time made him stingy for more and he hated that feeling.

”Lance!” The volacano was erupting with no evacuation time.

The Blue paladin shot his head towards the direction his name was being shouted, like a cat caught eating the canary. He jumped a foot away from the blade member and stared wide-eyed at Keith.

”I do like Messi!” He didn’t like Messi but he was determined to have something in common with the paladin. He recalled how Lance had sounded disappointed when he first gave him his answer.

_Thats too bad..._

Keith stormed off but not before seeing Lance’s jaw drop to the floor. He turned down the hallway headed to his personal locker in the blade’s base hoping to get some privacy to ride out the rest of his storm, but of course someone would be running down the hallway he just happened to be headed down.

The footsteps didn’t slow as they got closer and right as the sound became too close for comfort, Keith turned around only to collide with another body. Long, gangly arms wrapped around him tightly as they almost fell down together, but Lance held onto him securely as he planted his feet firmly to catch them both.

”Do you mean it?” His friend, and secret crush, huffed and breathed heavily into his ear, making him shiver. He knows it wasn’t intentional but the sensation drove Keith crazy and he blushed from how intimately close they were.

”Yes?” He replied unsure if he should continue the lie.

”Then I can kiss you?” Words he thouht he’d never hear from the beautiful boy from the Garrison.

”What?” Keith squaked.

”Oh...so you didn’t mean that you like me too? I could have sworn K was talking about me when he said he’d steal someone from you because lets face it I’m the only spanish speaking cutie in the universe worth stealing.” Lance was beginning to pull back as he weakly tried to sound confident, but Keith grabbed him by both of his forearms.

“Yes, Lance I do, but what does Messi have to do with me liking you?”

”I watched in an old Korean drama once that people used to ask each other if they liked Messi to see if they were interested in them and if they said yes then—“

Keith raised up on the tips of his toes and shut the mouthy Blue paladin up the best way he could think of. Lance’s lips were incomparable to anything his mind could conjure up and they moved so carefully, unsure, revealing to Keith his inexperience. 

“Lance, that is so stupid.” Keith smiled and a warmth he’d never felt bloomed in his chest.

”Hey, I didn’t make this stuff up all credit goes to last century.” He was staring into Keith’s eyes now, blushing. “So can we do that again?”

Keith laughed and raised his hands up to tangle into the Cuban’s messy cropped hair, deepening the kiss, and in the process, accidentally moaning into it causing both of the boys eyes to shoot open, both surprised by the sound that came deep from within Keith’s throat.

“Whoa.” Lance broke away first, “I can make you do that?”

”Don’t get too cocky _Sharpshooter._ ”

If Keith could think of all the reasons why he liked Lance, it would be his faked confidence hiding behind rambling and dusky cheeks. It would be long lashes fluttering closed and sharp inhales of breath and warm lips.

It would be goodbye kisses and soft whispers of promises of ‘see you soon, my space babe.’

Keith needed to remember to get him back for that one.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One ship down, one more to go :3  
> Also, i had to add ‘space babe’ because everything in space is ‘space something’ to lance! xD
> 
> The Messi thing is from a kdrama called weightlifting fairy kim bok joo. And there is a character in that show that I swear is Korean Shiro his name is jung jae yi. Hes in another drama i just finished too and the whole time im watching him all I think of is Shiro. xD

**Author's Note:**

> Im going to explain the Messi thing in the future so if anyone knows what I’m referring too pls shh lol. Message me privately and we can laugh about it. xD
> 
> I thought it would be fun to see behind the scenes and hear the thoughts of the secondary ship. I hope y’all enjoyed hearing keefers thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing it! :3
> 
> I might be adding Lance’s POV at some point but as for now it’s going to be strictly Keith.


End file.
